Lost in thoughts

floodgates of melancholy....now under repair...

Sunday, April 13, 2008 making-sweetness

my circadian clock (aka bio clock) is completely out of control and it's seriously impairing my judgement and affecting my mood. yeah....i have pretty BIGGGG mood swings, no thanks to my extreme tiredness and irregular sleeping time.

at least i finished and handed up my h3 lab report. i totally do not understand how that stupid mechanism works and suat's lab report seriously scares me. it's incomprehensible. all those stupid acronyms drive me crazy....i mean who knows what PL, COX, ABCA1, PPAR-alpha, etc means if you've never read that thing before? (or if you're reading it for the 2nd time at 4am in the morning....hahah...)

let's just say that my whole week was screwed up and i should have started doing that lab report earlier. i slept at around 2++am the whole of last week just reading and trying to understand that spastic topic. then i started piaing hardcore on thurs...serves me right. haiz. did while listening to the radio from afternoon all the way till goodness knows what time. let's just say that when i was finishing, i heard this loooooong drum-roll on the radio and was wondering what stupid out-dated song it was. until i heard the 1st few words....'mari kita...', then i sort of realised that i don't need to sleep liao. hahahaha....

if you all didn't know, they always play the national anthem on all radio and tv stations at 6am in the morning. hahahahahaha. i didn't know that 933 runs all night though....it really helped me stay awake.

of course, doing this sort of stupid things has repercussions. i wanted to die the next few days from extreme lack of sleep. still had some adrenaline in the morning to keep me awake during bio and econs lecture, but i just died during gp. i listened for a while, slept for 15 min, did 5 sentences of corrections and played pictionary! (wow....the funnest thing v deprived jane has done...hahah) i slept thru most of h3 later and bible study. seriously cmi lah. can see everyone who takes h3 bio looking like zombies on fri. yl and jolyn slept at 2+ i think, suat slept at 3+, wy slept from 11-1, then piaed all the way. that's a once in a lifetime occurence for wy...hahaha.

i think the only happy thing that happened last week was that 98.2% of the school got A for pw. that. is. serious. ownage. it's crazy lah! but we did put it a darn lot of effort.....our pi, wr, blah blah....were sooooo thick (compared to many other schools...)

BIG BIG THANKS TO MS ANG FOR TAKING TIME TO HELP US SOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH TO EDIT AND STUFF!!!! AND BIG BIG BIG BIG THANKS TO MY WHOLE GROUP!!!!!! =) YOU GUYS ROCK! SERIOUSLY! ok...maybe i'll do those personal thanking things another time, when i'm more sane and mentally 'there'.

ok...small font writing time again! hahaha....i'm seriously getting sadistic by having this weird tendency to lurve spoiling people's eyesight with puny words. hahahaha. too bad....我爽啊!

was greatly encouraged by what snr pastor dr tow said today. something about how you don't have to be a somebody to do God's work, coz God appreciates the works that nobodys do too. =) that really made my week. honestly. i know i'm incompetent yar....if you think you can do a better job, by all means, replace me. i seriously don't know why God plonks this kind of work on my lap, especially when i know that i'm not that good. but it's all in His perfect plan, so it's not for me (or for anyone else....) to question. i wanted to write something more fiery...but...it's better not to. this is the internet after all.

i know when people hate me lah. i'm not that stupid and blinded. i tried darn hard last year, but this year, forget it. i don't do things which are futile. no point lor. anyways, why should i go about pleasing people? sheesh. we're suppose to please God, not men. i rather dao those that i perceive just buay tahan me. no point lah. you'll be thinking 'how am i gonna get rid of her...' and other stuff, so i rather spare you the agony of thinking of ways to escape. it's not coz i'm really cold or anything....how i treat poeple is fashioned by how i think they percieve me (going by body language and stuff...it's really darn obvious sometimes.) i believe that there's no point talking/knowing peole who have a cerain bias against me and aren't interested in knowing/talking to me anyway. i'm darn sure that the people i'm talking about wouldn't read this anyway, so...who cares about what i type.

if i emo-ed to anyone in the past few weeks, just ignore what i said during my emoing. i'm wasn't in my right mind and i probably had some loose screws, like now. XP

POSTED BY mysticmalady AT 11:37 PM |

0 Comments

◄ Older posts making-sweetness

Newer posts ►