procrastinating and slacking again.....
hahahahaha.....jane is the master slacker! =) i should be studying and stuff, but, no......here i am wasting my time again. sometimes, i really wonder why people call me a mugger when all i do is slack all day long.....
monday: woke up super super late (as opposed to my proposed time of 6am....hahaha....who am i kidding. like i can really wake up at such an inhuman time....) and went to watch indiana jones with caro, cheryl, chuan, jolyn and yueling at cathay. =) nice company, cool cinema, lousy show. involves a 60++ old man running around, trying to wrestle a stupid plastic looking 'crystal' skull from the hands of the evil (and mad) psychopath so that he can place it back where it belongs. the plot is threadbare (literally....) and the skull looks like some toy that you can buy from your nearest toy store for 20 bucks. there's some reference to ET, national treasure, etc....but i'll give the entire (non-existent) storyline away by saying too much. let's just say that you're better off downloading the movie another day and watching national treasures 1 and 2 instead. only the chase in the jungle was cool....but the ants looked positively REVOLTING.
after that movie, we went to artfriend and stuff to look-see-look-see. interesting stuff they sell there.....hahah. gerielle was at taka too lah! at around the same time.....too bad we didn't bump into each other....=(
tuesday: went to do cip at the elderly care centre again. =) i really think that they are pretty poor thing and i don't want to end up like that. this aunty kept talking to me about the sad state of s'pore television tho....hahaha....couldn't help but agree. went for the retarded psychometric (dunno how to sp lah....) test in the afternoon...waste of my 4 hours. hahahaha.
wednesday: went for cip again in the morning. pity the aunties and uncles there weren't too enthusiastic (sth is really wrong with the sp...) about this whole drum circle thingy. had some cultural quotient workshop thingy after that, probably so that we wouldn't bring shame to the good name of hwachong when we're overseas. hahahahahahaha. practised after that....sians
today: went to k with gerielle!!!! chao fun! let's do it again when both of us are free k!!!! hahahaha. we are definitely experts at handling that remote control...hahaha. we had a backlog of 6pages ( totally maxed it out) when we had i hour more to go....but we still managed to finish it! yay! hahahahah....of course, thats' by skipping entire/parts of the songs. super funny...we kept laughing on and on....hahah. especially the 北鼻 in that gary chao song. it's obviously wrong lah. my chinese so poor also can identify such mistakes...hahaha. laughed until my stomach painful...hahaha.....
tomorrow: bio in the morning, prac in the afternoon, pack at night. then...WHEEEEEEEEEEE! quite excited!!!! hahahahahah...will be away till thursday night. =)
very sleepy....gonna sleep sleep liao.....
POSTED BY mysticmalady AT 11:52 PM |
confuddled....
everything here refers to sunday....as anyone can obviously tell since it's written slightly past 12am.
yay! going to watch a movie tomorrow! =) can finally go and play properly after a looooooooong time! =)
hahaha...elections was quite boring but i'm quite happy about how the results turned out. hahaha....i'm anti-establishment so the fact that the results was not what most of the exco expected pleases me. oops. hahaha.
jts was fun! thanks ah....call me aunty. =( shouldn't have such good hearing and must stop responding when i think people are calling me. it was at sakae and the restaurant personnel were quite desperate to chase us out after 7.30. luckily i shared 2 meals among 3 people (obviously, that refers to farrica, yingpeng and myself) otherwise i would be bursting at my seams. the bento is pretty huge and we ordered other side dishes to share with tianyi and zara. LURVELY SOFT-SHELL CRAB!!!! =) hahahahaa....i always order that when i'm there. managed to eat the korean street food thing (super oily and sinful french-fry sausage) and took nice neoprints! (3 of us +tianyi) lurved the 武林 one the best. we were bored people and just struck a kungfu pose...XP had to switch off the tap again after jts and ate icecream from venezia too....but we shared it....so not too bad. oh no...going to balloon....argh. getting fatter and fatter. tomorrow still go and eat ben and jerry's somemore...tsk tsk jane. =(
today's message was thought-provoking. i keep thinking about what the heck am i doing in these last days and why aren't i doing what i ought to do. why is it so hard to convert head-knowledge to heart knowledge?
went for this concert in the afternoon. cello and piano duet. =) but was quite tired and i'm not a huge fan of brahmns. (not sure if it's spelt correctly....) the encore pieces were SUPER NICE though, especially the last one by popper. it was high, fast, accurate and (mostly) in tune. chao zai lah!!!! totally awe-struck, jaw-drop kind of amazement at how good he is. was wondering what would happen if his fingers crammed up though...hahaha....quite randomly relevant.
oh wow....time flies. wish i could press 'return', 'delete', 'ctrl+z', etc... then i can return to the past, stop my foolishness and start studying earlier. sheesh...i'm too over-confident in my own abilities when i should be trying to do my best and relying on God for the rest. ooooo...it rhymes! must stop studying last last last minute. ok.....someone just pointed out something. no wonder they don't really bother/kaciao (i dunno how to spell that, but it's pronounced like that) me anymore about such stuff. how sensitive. yar....actually, i don't really give a damned sometimes. i think that's why i'm so annoying and i can really piss people off. at least i know that it kinda worked. hahahahahha....that's the only thing i'm thankful about. i guess it's back to normality again...or is it? i don't know. i don't know about the future, i just live from day to day.i don't borrow from its sunshine, for its skies may turn to grey.i don't worry 'bout the future, for i know what Jesus saidand today, i'll walk beside Him, for He knows what is ahead.many things about tomorrow, i don't seem to understand, but i know Who holds tomorrow and i know Who holds my hand. =)
POSTED BY mysticmalady AT 12:05 AM |
school's out! =)
woots!!!!! june holidays liao! seems like half of the year just whooshed past me. i'm totally like 'huh? it's already june hols? feels as though the school-year just started yesterday....'
still...i'm going to school for a greater part of the next week. haiz. HAIZ. haiz. elections and jts tomorrow. was just talking to a junior about elections and both of us were being downright cynical about it. well....it really is a bit biased towards a certain group of people, sadly. yar. there's a victim here lor!
i'm completely screwed for blocks.
1st week: go out and go to school. oh, and study for sats
2nd week: eating tomyam soup, going on 'cheap stuff shopping sprees', riding elephants and pulling cello strings. oh, and study for sats
3rd week: soaking in the sun, sand and sea. feasting on the word of God too. maybe i'll squeeze in some late night mugging time.
4th week: i think there's group outing. will spend alot of the time panicking over blocks too. just joking....i'll be studying like crazy.
see....effectively only have 1 week to mug. DIE. haahahahha.
ok....i'll go back to studying and i'll wake up early to mug. =( no time no time. especially since i'm going out soooooooooo often next week. watching movie on mon, going to k with gerielle (miss that little girl lor!) on thurs =)=)
我喜欢的那个他早已不存在...他已经完全消失了，从人间蒸发。
POSTED BY mysticmalady AT 11:49 PM |
slacking again.....
i'm literally melting/burning in the sweltering heat. the weather is absolutely DISGUSTING. makes everyone pespire so much....i bet i could use the oil on my face to fry an egg under the hot sun. hahahahahaha. the sun beats down mercilessly on the backs of those puny little earthlings, who are under it's mercy.....
sneaked out to coro yesterday, but was kinda suay, coz we saw the pe teachers when we went there. hahahahaha.....luckily they were nice people who pretended that they didn't see us...otherwise....hahahaha. been coming home super late these past few days and not studying at all...=( oh no.....blocks ah....gg. had the arts fest thingy yesterday, so had to put on that stupid halter. hahahahaha....it's actually really really hot in that halter. hot as in it makes you feel really warm and you start to pespire....not the other kind of hot. stayed back to watch the remaining bits of the concert coz i wanted to watch 'one missed call' again! XD LURVED THAT DANCE! camwhored with farrica and yingpeng, especially since it'll be the last time the 3 of us will ever share the same stage and perform together. =( at least i'll be rooming with farrica for the thailand trip.....bet it'll be super SUPER fun and we'll be talking on and on until late at night. hahahah.
erm...today. we missed bio (cues loud cheers, shouts of joy and cartwheels all around) to watch the bball match. hahaha....double champ. woot! super exhilarating! but girls one was nicer to watch than guys coz it was a closer fight for the girls match. they are really very meng and i'll be flattened before 10secs are up. but the guys one was very cool, exuding a certain kind of style and flair when they play. there's apparantly a 斗牛 thingy tommorow, which i don't intend to watch. but i was niaoing the guy in my section behind me coz he is taking part in it...hahaha.
heard this a few nights ago when i was doing work really late at night. pretty nice but it's kinda old. the starting is pretty cool, but i don't know why it reminds me of my kindergarten days...
http://www.qq530.com/Music_Play/23576.shtml分开旅行-刘若英 and some random guy who i suspect is 黄立行我选择去洛杉矶 你一个人要飞向巴黎
尊重各自的决定 维持和平的爱情
相爱是一种习题 在自由和亲密中游移
你问过太多次我爱不爱你
**black black heart. send给你我的心
计划是分开旅行啊 为何像结局
我明白停在你的怀里 却不一定在你心里
巴黎下了一整天雨
我不想要去证明 也不知道怎么证明
相爱是两人事情 我不喜欢你怀疑
怀疑爱是可怕的武器 谋杀了爱情
我在这里本来是晴朗好天气
**rap:休息一下不需要那么的密集
不必每一秒钟都粘在一起
你问我爱不爱你 这个不是个问题
早就说过需要空间才能继续
我也真的不希望你离去
我们就试试看各走各的路嘘～
别哭这个只是短短的度假
别搞得那么复杂
你不是一直说要去巴黎吗?
POSTED BY mysticmalady AT 10:30 PM |
dog-tired
went around half of singapore today....ok. yar, it's another exaggeration. just went to the ica building for something that took less than half an hour. then 'rushed' back to school for arts fest rehersal. waste of my time...spent lots of time laxing around, waiting for our turn to take centre-stage. only got home at 8pm. dead tired. tomorrow's another looooooong day with that stupid arts fest thingy and we have to wear that halter top again. at least there's the 'mid-day outing' to look forward to! hahaha....不能说的秘密. hahahaha....acting secretive.
better go back and study again. urgh...i'm a goner for my blocks man....sighs.
some people ah.....just wanna annoy me. hmph. roll eyes at you. XP
你过你的人生，我过我的生活....this sounds so grammatically wrong (in chinese terms).
POSTED BY mysticmalady AT 11:46 PM |
slacking away....
suppose to mug for bio evolution test tomorrow....oh wells. DAO. don't like that topic anyway. it's a piece of crap. utter rubbish. can't believe that i still have to study for it....
anyway, i'm just going to type some stuff to push the previous post down. it's pretty disconcerting to see that splodge of undecipherable red words....at least to me.
didn't do much work. all i did was pack away that mountain of worksheets lying on my table. yays. attempted to do some gp, but i kinda lost the most recent copy of the time magazine. oops. and i've been packing my life with other activities....hahaha...
went for SHAKE on friday after prac! SUPER NICE!!!! THEY TOTALLY RAWK MAN! kudos to nic, thomas and all the other MADpeeps. hahahaha. AND MS TAY AND HER HUSBAND WERE SOOOOOOO HAWT! really.... they brought out the essence of salsa! (if you can phrase it that way....) the weather in the afternoon was really hot too. went to thomson there to get flowers with yl, hh, kel and yogi. lotsa aimless walking around trying to find the place with the best, freshest, nicest and cheapest flowers =) the flowers are super cheap man....like around 4 bucks for 10 gerubera (argh.....i haf no idea how to spell it), about 10 bucks for a dozen huge roses and slightly more than 7bucks for a really nice bouquet =) can just randomly buy a whole lot of flowers and throw the petals on the ground for a very romantic effect of walking on flower-strewn pathways. hahahahahah.
love gerubera....however it's spelt. if roses signify love and passion, gerubera conveys feelings of joy and happiness. they're such bright, cheery flowers! =)
should bring such flowers to brighten up the mood in that elderly care-centre i went to do cip in on sat. just helping farrica out with her sl project. some drum circle thingy....sounds cool. the old folk there are quite pitiful. they look lonely and poor and sad. there was this old lady who kept talking to me about how wonderful it was to die so that she can go and be with the Lord sooner. (i guess she was a christian....) sort of agree with her, but i'm not going to kill myself anytime soon. it's a sin to commit suicide anyway... but i digress. did some drawing with the elderly there and all of them claimed that they couldn't draw coz they didn't go to school, blah blah. hahahaha.....then they forced me to draw. yes. jane, the girl who got c5 for art, did a lot of drawing. brian did alot of drawing too....he half 'dedicated' different drawings to the different old folk who were drawing on the same piece of paper as him. hahahahahah. sarah drew a BIG picture too....only farrica didn't draw much. the aunty that was with her kept drawing random stuff like a bowl of porridge, youtiao, a train, etc.
went for church choir bbq on sun. LOTS AND LOTS OF STUFF TO EAT!!! but like 80% of it was quite carcinogenic with lotsa burnt parts. hahahahaha. oh wells.....cancer is caused by an accumulation of mutations anyway. and we only live once....daos...just eat. hahahaha....and we won the games! =) poor shiqi and me had to join the basses coz there were too many sops...hahaha....but we got the last laugh! the dressing-up thingy was super funny, especially the altos' musician-cum-organ and our pa-crew with a very weird looking standing mic. (it looks like a drooping plant btw...) LURVED THE ONION NAAN TASTING THINGY, PRAWNS, GRILLED VEGETABLES, POTATO SALAD, BEEF, SATAY, COCKTAIL, ETC!!!! pity the marshmellows were gone in the blink of an eye...=( my fave fave fave marshmellows...=(
i think this should be long enough to push that post down....*crosses fingers and hopes for the best*
POSTED BY mysticmalady AT 10:41 PM |
letting go....
--disclaimer: this is an emo post (i think...) so don't bother reading it if you don't want to. if you think i'm talking about you, i might just be. trust your gut-feeling. if you have no idea what i'm going on about, you probably aren't the intended audience (tia), or (if you are tia) you probably just an insensitive brute. either that or i'm pretty good at hiding my feelings. yar, i know people might think i'm not true to myself by hiding my emotions beneath that mask, but it's a form of self-protection. yeps. i just need to RANT. otherwise, i don't know what other stupid things i'll do....explode? actually not...i'll just be super distracted and breakdown....perhaps. i don't know. i rant to forget and clear parts of my brain, so don't make me peeved by reminding me about sad stuff.--
ok...been having a really bad headache of late. those throbbing, on-off ones in the frontal lobe. (that's what they call the front part of the brain, the part near the forehead. that's if i remembered correctly. haha) maybe it's due to lack of sleep, over-usage of my eyes, completely messed-up sleeping timings, etc. actually i do think i know the cause: immense STRESS and thinking too much.
i hate myself for thinking so much about all sorts of rubbish. not just about school work (though i'm still subconsciously thinking about how to do the last question of the periodicity tutorial. chao hard....shucks. i sound like the innate mugger i am), but all sorts of other things, like why am i so annoying and why do i know things, yet not want to do anything about it. that's where a word i learnt this year comes in--i'm really hamji. for the record, hamji means being a scaredy cat in hokkien (or something to that effect. that's the explanation i got when i asked my friend. i don't know hokkien myself and i guess it's kinda loser-ish that i only heard of this word now....hahaha. so much for my dad being hokkien. but i digress...)
to be truthful, i'm just plain scared of the unknown and bad stuff that i anticipate. oh....and i'm scared of people hating me. don't ask me why, just accept it. that statement is the most ironic statement ever, especially since i can think of n reasons for people to hate me. sheesh....i can't stand myself either. it's no wonder i kinda see hate in tia's eyes. actually it's a toss-up between hate and indifference, but i've got this feeling that it's more of hate that i see. there's no other way to explain why tia just made a 180-degree turn. btw, tia refers to THE INTENDED AUDIENCE, not some stupid nickname, surname or initials. i look like i don't really care, but very very honestly, i'm shattered. humpty-dumpty fell off the wall kind of shattered. all the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put humpty together again. ok, maybe not to the extent that i'm beyond saving, just that it might take a looooong time for me to recover. argh......i sound like i'm obsessed with this thing..... yeah, i hate to admit it, but i probably am. argh. how else can something stay in my mind for such a loooooooong time, popping up at random times when i least expect it and getting itself entwined (sp?) in everything else.
it just takes one word, one action and i crumble. i often wonder why i should care so much, but i guess i can't help it. heard something tia said in a second-person form and i just flipped. lost it. just rolled my eyes at that statement and thought of how typical it was of tia. sheesh. but i don't know what i would have done if i heard it 1st-hand. yes....crumble. disintegrate. merge with the ground. just like the less-than-1-second incident. it seems so insignificant, but a wave of melancholy, a flood of morbid thoughts just hit me. BHAM! ultra gut-wrenching. but i don't think tia noticed very much, tia doesn't seem like an observant person (or is the scarier kind of observe and just decides to dao kind of person) somedays, it's torture. serious torment. on other days, i just decide to accept my ill-fate and get on with my life. of course, that's by psycho-ing myself that it's not worth investing so much time/brain power on worthless/hopeless causes.
not like tia would care.
but then again, this is just a whole lot of random rantings put together to take my mind of this spastic thing (and an excuse not to mug...hahah. i still don't know how to do that last periodicity question.)
somedays, i resolve to do something about it. but...jane hamji. as usual. just don't feel that it's proper (and there are people who agree with me...) oh....and coz i can't read minds. i have this feeling that whatever i do to attempt to rectify the prob would be futile anyway, or even have the reverse effect. how the heck do i know what tia expects me to do. maybe that's just the point, tia doesn't expect me to do anything. argh....why is my mind so active in coming up with pseudo-situations and inactive when it comes to doing proper work?
either way, it's pretty shameless to hold on to something that isn't and will never be. i kinda knew that it would turn out this way, but not this abruptly. one must stick to one's principles and mine is that i will never cling on to lost causes. no matter how much pain it causes, i would rather i bear the brunt (argh.....my sp is lyk...sai) of it than let others suffer. i don't think it's considered a sacrifice yet, but that's what i would do. that's one reason why i lurve the last line of jay's jie kou. the very very last line.
bittersweetness. i'll choose to remember the good stuff....shall dao the bad stuff. it's just that i feel so bewildered how can people change with a snap of their fingers. well, there is that extremely over-used statement that explains it: change is the only constant. hahaha...heard it one too many times. how cliche. of course, i'm hoping that it's not a case of 日久见人心....that would suck big time.
you can choose to ignore me. up to you. i'll just take it as time-out while i recuperate. that word looks wrong.....my spelling is really really atrocious.
POSTED BY mysticmalady AT 8:36 PM |
checkmate. game over
i've always wondered if intuition is a driving force behind many things that people do. does the anticipation that something would happen subconsciously affect the choices we make? it probably does....to a certain extent. obviously i know the answer, just trying to ask rhetorical questions. hahahahaha. especially since people base their intuition on their past experience. it's only natural that people will do everything they can to avoid meeting 'that end'. (if the end result is unfavourable and stuff.....)
ok...random musings....
anyway...haven't updated in a loooooooooooooooooong loooooooooooooooooooong time, especially by my standards. yeah, i'm the girl who updates almost every other day. hahahahaha. just too pooped out last week, the only thing i could think of whenever i reach home is SLEEP! i was soooo tempted to just dao my homework, take a shower, crawl into my lovely, oh-so-comfortable bed and sleep. but....haiz. duty calls.
last week was sooooo screwed. just as i had predicted at the start of the last week. (tried to) chionged homework and practise cello everyday after those countless sectionals/combined pracs in school. (pretty unsuccessful though, i never fail to fall asleep at the table.) oh man....i have to study for sats too....ARGH.
concert was ok ba.....not too bad a turn-out. was surprised that certain people went and kinda disappointed that certain other people couldn't make it. (even though i kinda know that they wouldn't come.....still....haiz) NEVERMIND. what's past is past. BUT 3 OF US SHOULD HAVE TAKEN MORE PICS! ESPECIALLY SINCE THIS IS THE LAST TIME ALL 3 OF US ARE PERFORMING TOGETHER MAN! too bad ying peng can't go to bangkok.....=(
need. to. rant. maybe i'll do so after dinner.....or tomorrow. hahahaha. just feeling confused, bewildered, etc....
POSTED BY mysticmalady AT 7:36 PM |
FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED
CHAO HIGH NOWWWWWWWWWWWW.....coz H3 IS OVER MAN!!!!!!!
the test was kinda ok. as in it's doable, but i'm very sure that everyone else would do well. in that case, i'll just die if they mark according to 'the curve'. i'm pretty sure that other people have studied much more than me and can crap up better stuff than me. so....bye bye distinction. XP
at least i wouldn't have a guilty conscience about lying my way to get an mc just to skip today's lessons (and especially math lecture test) in order to 'buy' more study time. just like econs, i crapped my way through that stupid math test. i hope i did it correctly, i even resorted to using guess and check...hahaha. of course i didn't study for math, i don't have that much time (or rather, i don't use my time well enough. jane's a slacker and a procrastinator. argh....must change)
ok...h3 down. now must practise darn hard for concert on sat. sians lah. I MUST MASTER TCHAIK AND SCHNITTKE!!!! especially the later. only eunice and me playing that part. and it's on off beats. and it'll be so embarrassing to be unable to play especially since there wouldn't be people to block me. XD
and must MUST must study for SATs. 1 MONTH TO GO. btw, anyone want to take ukcat with me? it's actually not very muggable (ie, don't need to prepare lah!), more like an IQ test. no LOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG lists of vocab words to memorise.
actually, i still have bio to do. DAOS. I NEED MY WELL-DESERVED BREAK. i think mugging for h3 really drove me mad. i was mugging at that insane timing again yesterday, then i went to sleep thinking about h3. caused a major nightmare. seriously. i dreamt that i was teaching gerielle (don't ask me why her. i dunno too. and she's an arts student who DOESN'T EVEN TAKE BIO) about gene recombination. (don't ask me why this topic. oh wait, i think it's coz that was the last thing i studied...haha) i was saying the exact steps and all. scary....too much bio frizzles brain cells.
ohhhhhOHHHHHHHHHH..... i was watching that channel u, 7pm show today. CHAO SWEET!!!! i loved that line yihan said to meiqi so much that it's my msn personal nick. hahahahah....it's like....bittersweet. ahhh...I LIKE! i couldn't take it so i continued watching the 2nd sister's wedding on youtube a while ago. SUPER FUNNY!!! lurve that guy....that younan person. he's so sweet, nice, understanding, devoted, shuai, funny, lame, caring, etc. (his character in the show at least.) AHHHH...haiz. i think i'm too much of a 'die-hard romantic'. but...it would be nice...hahahaha. ok....jane's daydreaming and fantasizing again. urgh....i'm disgusted with myself...sheesh.
ok....i wouldn't ruin this pretty high and happy post by saying too much depressing stuff. (though i am annoyed today at certain things which force me to do extra stuff early in the morning. blegh. and leave me worried for the whole day....stupid thing.) ok....maybe i'll start doing bio now. hahahahah
maybe i'm wrong. fine. so i'm sorely mistaken. fine. you have no idea man....no idea how much guts it takes to do it. on a completely random note, i totally agreed with nic, wenyan and nandhu. just randomly talking after lunch on friday as we reminiscene (i know the noun exist, but does the verb exist?) about happier times, when there weren't so many factions, bad blood, blah. just...miss those days too. but i think returning to those times is pretty much mission impossible. just like how those spontaneous systems normally have an increase in entropy, rather than a decrease. ARGH....NO.....H3 COMING BACK TO HAUNT ME....(and i didn't even do that question.....)
POSTED BY mysticmalady AT 11:00 PM |
distracted kid
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.....AWFUL WEEK AHEAD! h3 bio exam tomorrow and i'm not really prepared for it. =( sat is gonna be one AWFUL day coz of chem spa, bio lecture and concert. anyone wants to go for strings concert? PRETTY PREETTTTYYYYYY PLEASE? hahaha...
stupid math department. don't want to excuse us from math test tomorrow. =( so unsympathetic. sucks.
i was totally distracted and not focused during memorising those stupid notes.
1. it's EXCEEDINLY BORING. can't really blame my mind from wandering and going on a holiday.....
2. there's other stuff on my mind that i can't stop thinking about. going onto the brink of obsession liaoz. nooooo......but it's super sad and distracting. i just randomly think about it and have no mood to study. blegh.
due to my extreme ability to be distracted easily, i decided not to appear online (the past week) and not start convos(since start of term 2) and stuff...hahaha
POSTED BY mysticmalady AT 7:46 PM |
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