Don't mind me as I ramble on about mindless things! ^^

Jane. Child of GOD. Slacker medic. Part-time 'housewife', full-time watcher of dramas and variety shows. Ex-handbeller, occasional cellist, casual pianist. Who knows what else?

July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 April 2010 May 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 February 2011 March 2011 April 2011 May 2011 June 2011 July 2011 August 2011 September 2011 October 2011 November 2011 December 2011 January 2012 February 2012 March 2012 April 2012 May 2012 June 2012 August 2012 September 2012 October 2012 November 2012 December 2012 January 2013 February 2013 March 2013 April 2013 May 2013 August 2013 September 2013 November 2013 April 2014 June 2014 July 2014 November 2014 January 2015 March 2015 April 2015 May 2015

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half laxing today coz of council election stuff. wanted to sleep through the whole thing but it was kinda uncomfortable in that seat, it was kinda noisy and some of the videos were quite interesting. hahahah. but was quite sleepy for all the lessons after that...like the kind where i fall asleep while writing stuff.

haiz...got back chem...like blegh. i must die die go and find that 1 mark to jump grade. i should have gone to tikam something correctly or find for marks in structured. likelihood of finding that elusive 1 mark is probably quite slim since i didn't write very much for structured and free response (really dunno how to do mah....then what u expect me to crap...)

aiyah....fail then fail lah. haiz..................ok, so maybe i didn't fail going by the revised, lowered passing mark. STILL....MY STUDIES ARE SOOOOOOO SCREWED. ahhhhhhhh....still got that stupid lab report to do....DAOS. I SHALL HAPPILY GO 4 FUN-O-RAMA TMR AND SEE MY FRIENDS...

yups....emoing alot now. hahaha. shall rewind and go back to happier times. ie jts yesterday.

ok...for the record, the food at shokudo is actually not as bad as it sounds on those comments. just avoid places which don't have a queue in front of it (especially the pasta. it just tasted very very weird. even this friendly rubbish bin rejected it after koping 1 strand from either wenyan or suat.)

went out of the house kinda late and met estelle (the junior who stays at maplewoods too...) at the bus stop. well, didn't really need to rush so much since most people were late or very late anyway. we just ripped the juniors off man!!!! it's only coz some people didn't come so we could eat up their share of the money, otherwise, we would have exceeded by ALOT. almost 4oo bucks for 19 people. and we were only suppose to spend 15+ bucks each lah! oops. i don't care....who ask them not to come. scott even said that if he had known there was still a bit of leftover money, he would have bought somemore stuff. hahahaha.

anyways....ate this not-too-bad-tasting katsu and egg thingy, then shared waffle, CHEESECAKE!!!!, yakitori thingy, dumplings, rosti, mango ice thingy, green tea and red bean ice thingy, etc. interaction with class people:90marks, interaction with juniors: zero. oops. hahaha. well, they all zhammed seats together before we even got there lor...haiz. our table, made up of all the girls who went (me, nic, wenyan, veron, suat, jolyn, cheryl, caro, monkey) and a very random jianan was the noisiest table among the lot, if not the whole restaurant. double oops. we looked like a bunch of starved hooligans, standing around armed with cutlery, attacking all the food there. oh wells....heck lah.

went to take neoprint too!!!!! the machine was kinda small lah....but still can squeeze like 8 people in it. hahahaha. i think we made ALOT of noise coz EVERYONE was looking at us when we came out of there. oh wells. triple oops. and i regret wearing my imba high wedges....walked/stood around too much. hahaha.

sians..... why must there be school today. somemore get back math. SIANS. failed lah...duh. expected. but didn't fail as badly as i thought i might. wah....very long haven't failed math liaoz. that leaves me with 4 more subjects to fail. hahahaha. must start working even harder.....even if it'll probably kill me first. hahahaha.

maths....HECK LAH. DAOS. yar right....like who will believe me. 拜托，连我都觉得假得要命。hahaha.....i'm weird lah. the more i say that i don't care about something, the more i mean the opposite. argh....it's just my innate, unexplainable need to hide my true self, so to speak. i hate failure. hate it to the core. becoming more and more hypocritical lah....i may say it's just a stupid thing, but actually i really think it's kinda important and stuff. feel really morbid lately. don't know why....please tell me it's hormones. coz hormones follow a cycle...so i'll get outta this stage soon enuff. maybe it's my screwed up sleep pattern. the 1 that makes me die pretty quickly...not that i mind so much. hahahaha. just been emoing alot. well....now i keep myself 'busy' (in a way) so that i wouldn't keep thinking such random, morbid thoughts. oh yes...and so that i wouldn't keep screwing up my tests and exams. i hate it when people keep thinking i'm super hardworking or smart or something. i soooooo know that i'm this big fat lazy pig who doesn't like to study at all, just sit in front of the com/tv and rot there. shucks....i sound lyk some loser who's overly preoccupied with stupid results. i am a loser. hahahaha. wells....bad results wouldn't break me, but there are other things that can. marks are just stupid numbers...sheesh. breaking point. yup...soon enough. can feel it lah....一直憋在心里，一点都不好受。at least i kinda left off some of it today....好久好久没像今天那样了。though it's not some weird sudden violent outburst, it's quiet, controlled letting off of the steam. not so freaky yet. and definetely not in front of other people. but it was...sudden. outta the blue,green,purple, blah.

looks are decieving. beneath that seemingly calm sea is a storm raging beneath, waiting for the correct conditions that would turn it into the perfect storm.

ok...so i didn't go out in the end...i did a bit of bio instead coz there's bio tut tomorrow. so no life...=( hahahaha. but i'm going out for jts later!!!

can hear the thunder outside....please don't rain when i wanna go out and walk to the bus stop....i hate walking in the rain. =( and i need to leave soon somemore.....=(

well......at least i could catch up with my yuan lai wo bu shuai since i didn't go out. SO NICE AND CUTE!!!!! i was laughing and laughing and laughing away at the com....it was quite retarded. hahahaha. ahhhhhhh....and ah kang finally decided that actually man man is nicer!!! and sisi is soooooooo funny.

i really like the ending song!!!! i don't care if others are positively sick of hearing it on the radio, walls ice cream advert, etc. it's such a nice song!!!! and it's sung by jj (i'm seriously biased towards him....hahaha.) but i prefer it when he sings solo and not as a duet with jinsha (though i lurve all the other songs that they sang duet together. they make a good duet pair....hahaha)

期待爱-林俊杰/金莎

my life 一直在等待 空荡的口袋
想在里面放一份爱
why 总是被打败 真的好无奈
其实我实实在在不管帅不帅

~~想要找回来 自己的节拍
所以这一次，我要勇敢大声说出来

**期待，期待你发现我的爱
无所不在我自然而然的关怀
你的存在心灵感应的方向
我一眼就看出来是因为爱

***我猜你早已发现我的爱
绕几个弯，越靠近越明白
不要走开，幸福的开始就是放手去爱

~~
**
***

it's seriously threatening to pour now....better go out before i get caught in the rain...

FREEDOM!!!!!!! AT LONG LONG LAST!!!!!!!!

bio is finally over!!! it was kinda ok, for a hc bio paper. left like 18 marks worth of blanks...hahaha...not too bad for a hc bio paper, which is notoriously hard. i'm quite surprised that i didn't fall asleep halfway during the paper or something coz i slept really really late last night, or rather, really really early this morning. i'm even more surprised that i didn't sleep during the movie or on the bus to orchard and back home.

i shouldn't have slacked the previous few days away and then take naps yesterday, then i wouldn't have to pia and memorise until so late yesterday, i mean so early today. slept slightly (only really slightly!) more than 2hrs yesterday before i had to wake up to go to school....happy working out what time i slept, considering that i can sleep in until 6.40 if i wanted to be on time in school.

i also wished that people wouldn't try so much funny business during bio paper, holds everyone back....and i wonder what possessed them to make them do such stupid, time-wasting stuff (whether by accident or not...i dun care....) under mrs foo's nose. but i really pitied that urgent guy at the back....hahahahahah.

and then.....LIBERATION!!!! we fled to orchard like migratory birds escaping the harsh winter to go to some sunny place. i just felt like using some form of rubbish literary device...hahahah. girls outing again....the guys would probably have died of boredom if they tagged along with us. there was me, suat, wenyan, caro, jolyn, yueling and nic. chuan came late after chucking her stuff at home and cheryl came even later after running....sheesh

had lunch at food republic at wisma before it got too crowded. then went to cine, took neoprints and watched step up 2! the plot is...nonexistent. but the dances were all SO SLICK AND COOL! really wants to make you wanna take up dancing too....but i'll probably fall down and break a couple of bones first. hahahahah. they also kept stereotyping against asians, especially with that asian girl who has an accent. like.....that's so mean. what makes them think that all asians have an accent when they speak english...=( the abc-looking tall guy in the main crew looked pretty cool though...hahaha. and the movie only cost us 6 bucks!

then walked back to wheelock for icecream! never heard of that shop 'haato' before today, but it sells really good japanese ice cream!!!! XD had a really really good black sesame cone which tasted like my all time fav chinese dessert 芝麻糊, just with more sesame bits. cheryl said it looked like the cement she used to make the roads in chiangmai. -_-" fine....so black sesame is an acquired taste. argh.....my dieting plans just got thrown out of the window, especially with jts tomorrow.....arghhhhhh....i'm gonna have to remain fat for the rest of my life...=(

since tomorrow is school holiday too, i'll prob be going out again before jts!!!!!!!!!!!!! i don't care if it's to k, watch movie or shop....i just don't wanna stay at home on such a rare occasion like this. i bet all the shops would be teeming with hc people who all have holidays. hahahahahahahah.

i'm surprised i'm still awake now. they say people with irregular sleeping timings (ie, me) die pretty young/are more susceptible to some life-threatening disease or something like that. wow...that's just great. i'm gonna kick the bucket much sooner than most people i guess....with my screwed-until-can't-be-screwed-up-anymore kind of sleep timing. ok....my eyes are half open and my sleep-deprived brain is pounding...shall just dao bio tut until tomorrow or something. WHY MUST THERE BE LESSONS ON THURSDAY???=( ESPECIALLY TUTORIALS....=(

due to my inability to tahan mugging for a long time, i'm eating my lunch while typing and chilling out. hahahahaha. i sure wish that the contracters/workmen next door renovating the neighbours' house would take lunch/kopi/tau huey/donut/tea and whatever breaks that exist as long and as frequently as i take laxing breaks. it's really super noisy....=( i was soooooooo sian that i actually helped my mum sweep the floors and other housework.

1 more day to freedom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! technically speaking....it's less than 24 hrs to freedom.....and i can't wait man!!!!!

Up from the grave He arose, with a mighty triumph o'er His foes.
He arose a victor from the dark domain and He lives forever with His saints to reign.
He arose, He arose, Hallelujah, Christ arose!

the only pity was that i (or anyone else in the family for that matter) couldn't wake up early enough to got for sunrise...=( i really wanna go for sunrise service one day.....shouldn't have slept so late yesterday. at least i didn't sleep during the message! XP which was quite good. and i really thank God for preserving my voice....i feel some form of sickness creeping up on me. hahahaha...even my mum told me to eat my antihistamines coz i was sniffling/sneezing throughout dinner.

no choir in the afternoon, so went to eat at IMM. cheese-baked rice which was sooooooooo good (and loaded with calories....darn....) i didn't know that 'portuguese chicken' meant that it had curry. it just seems to....bizarre. did portuguese really have a fetish for curry stuff? hmmm....either way, i'm gonna have to do my sit-ups and run run run to get rid of all that fats i acquired from sitting down to mug. i'm getting fat. seriously. arghhhhhhhh....why did i eat that cheese baked rice?!?!?!?

anyways...2 days to freedom!!!!!

jts is on wedsnesday...and it's gonna be at Shokudo at raffles city basement. did some 'researching' (people need a break from mugging mah....) to see what sort of stuff they had to offer. it's sort of like Marche, with that same 'marketplace' kind of concept and they give you a card to charge your purchase to. was looking some foodie's blog and she said that it's much more reasonable than marche (i totally agree with her that marche's food is over-prized...) and there's quite a wide variety of food.

this is the most interesting thing i gleaned from the blog:there are NEOPRINT MACHINES in there!!!!!!!!! XP can go and take neoprint after neoprint!!!!XD

that doesn't bode too well for the food. but "Shokudo sells mainly Japanese-style cuisine. There’s sashimi, udons, sushi, and many western-style Japanese food. Another so-like-Marché thing about Shokudo is that they also has a stall selling rösti, except some “Japanese touches” has been added to the dish, such as the sprinkling of seaweed on top of the dish." well...that's what the blog said. the blog is http://www.foodieparadise.sg/?cat=6 btw. i was quite distracted by the post above about sun and moon cafe at wheelocks place. now THAT is what i would call good jap food....the pics of the food from sun and moon had me salivating.....seriously. but of course, it's more ex and i don't think the juniors have the money to treat us to that.

back to shokudo, at least i know that the pizza is mediocre and not that filling. (i'm quoting her...) and it's almost 10 bucks lah!!! that means that i wouldn't waste so much of my money on the pizza....maybe i'll just kope a bite from someone who decides to try the pizza anyway. hahahaha.

well, i still don't know what to eat...so i searched again! got this off stomp (http://www.stomp.com.sg/stfoodiesclub/taste/119/index.html). they suggested grilled skewers (which i'll try and convince someone to share with me...), teppanyaki beef tenderloin (i wouldn't try that...it's more than 10 bucks and i wanna maximise my treat...), bamboo barbecued eel rice (i'll prob eat that as a main...it's less than 4 bucks leh!), mushroom cheese burger (wouldn't try it for same reason as the beef coz it's 7+ bucks for a pathetic burger) and TOFU CHEESECAKE!!!! (yar...i'll try that! XP)

but i did see many who said not to bother trying it. oh wells....not i pay what, so just dao. hahahahahah. and there's discount for people with ocbc credit cards (like mi dad)...don't think any of the juniors would have credit cards now.... but then again....they could be sooooooo rich and have credit cards.... hahahaha.

ok...sleep time....before i start mugging like siao for tuesday's killer bio. argh. ARGH. ARGH!!!

yup! good friday was yesterday! =) i still don't get why Jesus would wanna die for such wretched, disobedient, pathetic ingrates like me. His agape love is wayyyyyyyyyyy too great for mere mortals like me to understand. but i'm soooooooo thankful for all that He's had to suffer to pay the prize for MY sin and for the sins of the world. i just wish that i can do more than just marvel at His love and grace...even though i do know that whatever i do will NEVER be enough to repay my debt to Him.


thank you Jesus, for all you've done on the cross....


yesterday's service was good! (though i got back home at around 11+ and had to mug until dunno what time for today's spa skill a.) the offering song was really nice!!!!!!! had an air of melancholy to it and the words were so full of meaning. pity uncle bernard was a tad more than out of tune and his sound was a bit dead coz he didn't vibrato...or else it would be even nicer =)


love this song we sang for choir presentation yesterday =) can't find the tune to it though, i guess just posting the lyrics will suffice. the melody is really very very nice and sweet!


All because of Your amazing grace- words and music by Cindy Berry

When I think of the depths of Your mercy, when I consider Your love for me,
My soul wells up with highest praise to the One who has set me free.

**I am amazed by the gift of Your glorious grace,
Your grace that changes me, that sets me free forever.
One day soon I will see Your face, all because of Your amazing grace.
**
Grace, grace, God's (marvelous) grace, grace that will pardon and cleanse within;
what grace, grace, God's (imfinite)grace, grace that is greater than all our sin.
What glorious, unending, incomparable love.
Salvation is mine, forever, forever.
**
Amazing grace.

really nice song with very very meaningful lyrics XD. still undecided if i should go for sunrise tomorrow...it starts at 6.30am, so must be up around 5+....that's much much earlier than the norm time i wake up to go to school...hahaha...

my sis told me that nerissa said my blog was funny....she said something about how i always complain about mugging or something. ok...my pain, someone's pleasure. hahaha....sad life i live.

this is insane..i bet no one else has exam on saturdays. waste my time....stupid mock spa skill a. just went there and crapped for an hour....at least i finished writing EVERYTHING. 1st time leh! hahahah....but some people already know the question....no fair. i thought temp can't possibly come out...but it did. luckily i went to read through that bit once.

argh....back to mugging for bio 3 days to freedom!!!!!!!!!

man....was laxing around too much today. way way way too much. just looked through viruses and bacteria and a little little bit of cell division. hahahaha....and there wasn't even school today. hahahaha....so laxing. bio will probably be uber hard and it's not that far away either...i should be hyperventilating lah! noooooooo...cannot be soooooooo laxing....argh......

made a fatal mistake of checking out the ep of yuan lai wo bu shuai i stopped at....after opening part 1, just couldn't stop watching until i finished watching that episode. i guess it didn't help that i only started watching at like 1.30++AM. hahahaha...no school mah....can sleep in and stuff. anyways....very very sian diao today, don't feel like studying at all. but....haiz. stupid blocks. going to fail everything anyway, studying won't make much of a difference.

seriously cannot wait till next tuesday afternoon. i cannot tahan this mugging nonsense any longer. ARGH....SIANS...

that's probably why i blog so much....too sians to study. i much rather write a whole lot of crap than study how cells divide or something...which i'm suppose to do now. oops. ahahahaha. cannot lah...brain has reached saturation point. i won't retain anything i mug anyway, so just dao and relax a bit (not like i haven't relaxed alot today....hahaahahaha.)

oooooo...reached 100th post liaoz. that's about 11 posts a month, which means i blog once every 2-3 days. hahahaha...oh wells. bored people (like me) do boliao things like blogging.

shall listen to somemore of my emo-ish songs as i emo about life in general. don't know why so emo nowadays....(ok...maybe i do know what i'm emoing about. hahahaha...of course i do. nothing much lah, just thinking too much and taking things a little too personally maybe? bored people, ie people mugging for sian diao exams, usually have very active minds that tend to wander a lot, lost in a world of daydreams and stuff....oh ya, my worrying marks are stuff i can emo about too. i'll be over the moon if i pass my blocks....esp math and chem. really scared. i don't think i studied/practised enough and i left sooooooooo many blanks. now, i'm not worrying about how many marks i minused, i'm estimating how much marks i may get, ie from method marks and the rare few that i know how to do. i left sooooooooo many blanks, it's worrying. nevermind. whatever i get, it's all for the glory of the Lord. no point crying over spilled milk. i'm emoing 20% about the exams, 80% about something else....something that i shouldn't even be distracting myself with now. but cannot help it lah, it's like soooooo obvious, in your face kind of thing and it hurts. brings to mind 1 of the quotes i used as an msn nick really long ago. want to cry, but don't think it's worth it. no point investing so many brain cells into this kind of...s***. i wanna do something, but i'm not sure if it's correct. i just don't like how things are now. hate change. 想回到过去, when i didn't think so complicatedly or things weren't so complex anyway. but i'm scared, not sure of what. of being dragged down that path again? maybe it's my own undoing. maybe it's coz i'm really stupid. i dunno. not going to kill even more of those already half-killed by math and/or chem brain cells)

ooooooooooo...they're playing leo ku's 情歌王 now! a really fitting title coz of all those nice nice love song snippets there. ok....i'll go do somemore work till the song ends...i heard bits of somemore emo songs that i like...hahahaha

TRIPLE WHAMMY (going by no. of days...) QUADRUPLE WHAMMY (going by the no. of subjects....which were all blegh...) 6-FOLD WHAMMY (going by the no. of papers...each was worse/about as bad as the previous one...)

in all, die liao. felt half dead after yesterday's chem, feel officially certified dead after today. just feel brain drained....not fully functioning and stuff. keep doing stupid things, thinking stupid things and just being stupid. math was dreadful. just like chem. left alot of blanks and couldn't finish the paper for both. econs was so-so, just hoping i wrote what they want to see...it's so subjective and i was writing crap half the time, especially for the part about how can the small cafe survive (dunno wad stuff about dif flavoured coffee, special delivery service and all that spastic things...). gp was the most doable thing among the lot though i could only do 1 out of the 12 essay topics (the rest just drew a 'huh? simi taici?' kind of response from me), i'm not sure about vocab words and i didn't finish my AQ (as usual....XP)

can't wait for next tues AFTERNOON (i dread the morning bio paper....). gotta survive about another week more of immense torture, stone-ness, sian-ness and headaches before FREEDOM!!!(until the time i need to start doing that awful, retarded, no-idea-what-to write lab report thingy)

of course, i'm suppose to start mugging for bio now, but as usual, i'm too depressed to start. need time out before chionging again. XP already talkcock during lunch time at btm since we were all stuck there after it started pouring. blame that slow eater with a seemingly bottomless stomach.

just slept and slacked the rest of the afternoon aways....must relax the mind before tackling that horrible, must mug like siao bio. maybe i'll start later, after dinner.

but for now...i feel like typing an imba long post about random things. was looking at the songs i have and i realise they are mostly emo-ish songs, duets and songs from my fav singers/groups (who also contribute to my emo song/duet collection...) here are some of my fav fav emo songs! i remember emo songs much better than fast,happy, catchy songs for some strange, unexplainable reason. maybe i'll write about my fav duets some other time if i feel like it. XD some of the songs are kinda old (as in really not very recent....), but daos. they are nice ok!

i lazy to upload...my com always takes v long to upload stuff... so i'll just post the lyrics, anyways i bet most people have heard it before. and it's not in order of preference, it's just in order of when i chance upon it....XD


我们怎么了-SHE (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CUq96orty2k)

落泪以前再看一眼你模糊侧脸, 这会不会是最后纪念
我凝视你而你凝视窗外的阴天, 一句抱歉都僵在嘴边

**我搞不懂我们到底怎么了, 诚实的背后是否住着伤口
我想不透我们的爱怎么了, 雨下过以后是否能让什么复活

你的笑脸还在胸前晃动着昨天, 为何回忆会让人晕血
如果我们继续向前走进雨里面, 会不会有溶解的危险
**
明明从前连真挚都很甜美, 现在怎会说句话就能肿一边
**

nice song no.1! the tune is really sweet and the words...they just reek of utter confusion and dejection. the mv is pretty sad too...the plot is very typical, but for some weird, unexplainable reason, the ending always cracks gerielle and me up. it's kinda illogical to burn up your cupboard coz your bf split up with you and the way the cupboard burns just looks so....fake. i think that's the fault of the director...hahah.

擦肩而过-李圣杰 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eZ7lFMIw9-I)

我爱着谁爱到我有点醉， 告诉我你是谁 能够把我让我变不对
你不会累但我却爱你爱得好累， 从没有为了谁不顾安危付出一切

~~站在这平衡点， 我还是觉得有点危险
或许是看不见， 只能够靠感觉

**他不会是个好男人， 也不会是个好情人， 你对我说我们只是擦肩而过
好的男人有那么多， 少了他的日子也能过
我不会再让你寂寞， 也不会让你更难过， 你听我说要好好学着去生活
就算未来有多少错， 至少还有我的问候， 我的温柔陪你度过

你听我说你不要这么做， 你不要看着我说你已经知道怎么做
你很难受，我愿意陪你一起承受， 只要你不怕痛再多坎坷我都陪你走
~~
**

nice emo song no. 2! this is quite new bah and it's definitely suppose to be sung by a guy. actually, i only like the chorus and can only remember the chorus. the tune for the verse isn't as catchy/memorable. but the whole song is definitely emo, like many of this guy's songs. didn't really like him that much until now...haha. still...love the chorus to bits! XD it's got this whole 'jealous, nice and protective bbf of a suicidal girl coz she just got ditched' kind of tone. quite sweet lah...even the mv is emo. this guy is waaaay emo.

你爱我吗-樱桃帮 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ihV25n7jy1o)

你爱我吗？你是爱我的吧
未来真的很长如果你不愿意回答， 最后我会再问你一次，你爱我吗？

从前我们走过的地方， 像是一幅幅美丽的画
曾经那些天真的梦想， 是不是只能是童话
为什么我们变成这样， 拿着电话却说不出话
或许眼泪不让它流下， 就好像不那么悲伤

**你爱我吗？你是爱我的吧
当你眼睛闭上， 低下头不说一句话
你爱我吗？你是爱我的吧
未来真的很长如果你不愿意回答， 最后我会再问你一次，你爱我吗？

为什么变得如此沉默， 回忆我们最初的承诺
就让那些浪漫的所有都消失这黑色天空
**

nice emo song no. 3! ok..i know most people don't quite like cherry boom, but i think this song is sooooo emo and nice though it's a tad old too... love their style of punk rock in this super emo song which makes it sound quite different from normal emo songs. it's so sad lah, all this rhetorical (sp? haha) questioning and pondering about the sweet memories going on throughout the song. used to be my all time fav song to emo too...still ranks 1 of my top emo songs now. i don't care if people don't like their style of music....i think it's cool with loads of attitude.

味道-辛晓琪 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v3OF95j6ElM)

今天晚上的星星很少， 不知道它们跑那去了
赤裸裸的天空星星多寂廖

~~我以为伤心可以很少， 我以为我能过的很好
谁知道一想你思念苦无药，无处可逃

**想念你的笑， 想念你的外套， 想念你白色袜子和身上的味道
我想念你的吻和手指淡淡烟草味道， 记忆中曾被爱的味道

今天晚上心事很少， 不知道这样算好不好
赤裸裸的寂寞朝着心头绕
~~
**

this is super old, more than 10 years old liao. think it was released in '95 or somewhere around there. it's even turned into a 经典歌曲. hahaha...not surprised. it's another emo song with a 'pining for love' kind of tone. just don't understand why she likes cigarette smell so much...hahah. anyways, i always quite liked this song, just didn't know it's name and who sang it. haven't even heard of her until like just now. hahahaha. but it's definitely a very long-lasting song and it sure is emo.

借口-周杰伦 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3fbCMJbSVcM)

翻着我们的照片， 想念若隐若现。 去年的冬天我们笑得很甜
看着你哭泣的脸对着我说再见， 来不及听见你已走得很远

也许你已经放弃我， 也许已经很难回头
我知道是自己错过， 请再给我一个理由说你不爱我

就算是我不懂， 能不能原谅我？ 请不要把分手当作你的请求
我知道坚持要走是你受伤的藉口， 请你回头我会陪你一直走到最后
就算没有结果， 我也能够承受， 我知道你的痛是我给的承诺
你说给过我纵容， 沉默是因为包容， 如果要走请你记得我

如果难过请你忘了我

emo song no. 5! this is like the 1st jay song that i can really remember the lyrics, play on piano and stuff. i know it's kind of old too...but i really like it. it's just so sweet yet sad...especially the last lines of the song. sooooo sweet! i'll use it as my parting lines if someone wants to split up with me next time. hahahahaha....i still don't understand why jay go and find all the angmohs to stare in the mv. maybe there's a lack of chinese people there where he was filming. hahaha. i also wonder if it was written to jolin....hmmmm... hahaah.

5 emo songs should be enough bah....i still have lots of emo songs that i like. hahaha. oh! there's one really cool song that is as good as a love song compilation. it's 情歌王 by 古巨基. but it's super long, like around 10 min i think...there's a chinese version and a canto version if i'm not wrong. so far, i've only heard the chinese version and it's quite cool to hear snippets of the dif styles/era of love songs being played all at 1 go.

very long long post....can make up for many days of blogging. hahaha...shall start mugging bio tomorrow...sians

i thought i could stay away from the com till like wednesday, but cannot tahan looking at another set of notes no more. just...died. like the rest of the level i guess....hahaha. blocks have screwed my sleep up. i wake up at the weirdest times, mug abit more then go and back to sleep for barely more than an hour then go to school. hahahahahaha...i'm too tired at normal times. my eyes don't want to open more than 5mm wide. and my brain hurts. so does my hand.

yesterday my hands threatened to drop off. today, my brain felt like getting out of it's 'comfy' home in my skull, pounding against the walls of my forehead like a scared child banging his hands in vain against the locked exit as he tries to escape from whatever terror is behind him. i blame the terrible, awful awful paper and my immense lack of sleep. stupid chem teachers. i swear its a ploy by the teachers so that they can mark less and have a rolling good laugh over the crap we give them.

ok.....back to studying math. my neighbours are at it again....drilling away....haiz....and i'm going to drift off very soon.

算了吧。。。一切会过去的。。。(and i'm not just refering to that stupid *&^*&^%#$&^%&*&^ block test)

i'm starving now...just waiting for dinner to be ready. ahhhhhhhhh...econs and gp tomorrow! still need to go through macro once and look at gp? hahahahaha...just daos gp....

anyways....i've been attempting to study the past few days. ATTEMPTING. (i never said it was successful...) my family has been ruining my study plans though...don't think i can finish studying. i'm not gonna study today too...keep the sabbath day holy mah. i'll probably do what i did during promos...hahahahahhaha

oh! was dragged out to cut my hair on friday before h3 (study plan obviously ruined....) my mum couldn't stand it anymore, think mr yeow nagging at 'all the boys with long hair' to go and cut their hair.hahahahaha...couldn't be bothered with the look...just asked them to cut shorter with the same style. couldn't care less....at least it didn't turn out too bad.

was dragged out again on sat to take passport pic coz it's gonna expire soon. (study plan ruined again....) and that's why i'm gonna die tomorrow. hahaha...okok, maybe it's an exaggeration.

hahahaha...back from dinner and watching bits of shark tale. very funny!!!!! oops. i shouldn't be doing that...like....today. hahahahah...oh wells. i'm gonna sleep at a wenyan time, ie very very early.

aiyah....and the other day i was suuuuuuuuper annoyed at having to print out notes for my friend, especially after the paper jam. =( hahahah. takes away my study time, printer ink and paper....but nvm. daos. still generally fine with helping people out (should lah...it's called being nice. and that's what we're suppose to do...) so long it isn't morally wrong or i can't help anyways. and i'm always exceptionally grumpy during rainy days (exact opposite to my serious-but-has-a-few-loose-screws math teacher in upper sec who ALWAYS goes high on rainy days...)

ok...maybe i'll go to sleep now....then do what i did during promos...hahaha. actually, should wait for my dinner to digest first...

i'm getting super random liaoz

DIE!!!! FAINT!!! PUKE!!!!!! ok, fine. i'm exaggerating here. i can't take it no more man...sians. i blog alot more during mugging time due to extreme sian-ness. just gonna take a breather before i plunge into the world of chemistry. it'll probably induce more puking, gagging, fainting, etc on my part.

i'm using printing h3 notes as an excuse to use the com. hahahahahahhaa. stupid h3. now have to write research paper leh, like....oh man. GG LIAO. =(

my mood today is as good as the weather. woke up 'early' and went for econs, then ate at mad jack. took a bus home and kena stranded at the bus stop with caro coz of the extremely, ultra heavy downpour. then waded home in the rain (another exaggeration coz i went home from the mg bus stop where the path is less flooded than the nexus bus stop.)

no power at home when i got back....kinda forgot that they were checking the power supply thingy or something. whatever it was, i didn't have electricity...=( just quite annoyed....so went to sleep. it was too dark to do work anyway (not like i felt like doing work....)

just felt annoyed, irritated and distracted for the rest of the day. whoever dares to piss me off now....i'll eat them up. hahahahahahahahahahahha. like real...i'm not a cannibal yet. hahahahahahaha. just felt like typing that. it's stress relieving...hahahahah. like real.

haiz....有时候，不知到自己为何在乎那种无聊的事。越想就越难过，干脆不要想了，可能心情会比较好一点。哈哈。。华文真的好烂，所以才要多练习。。哈哈。快要疯掉了。现在想起来，觉得自己好像常常被人家scam 了.（see....this is terrible. can't even think of the chinese equivalent..oh man, my spelling is going down the drain too....nvm. back to the point....if there was one in the 1st place. i'm seriously typing crap now while printing my notes...) 人家拜托我帮他们做什么鬼事我都蛮爽快地答应，真的给自己添麻烦。也常常只顾别人的感受做事，到头来还是自己伤心，难过，自责。。。sounds wrong. nvm...hahahahah. 也许朋友说得对：在这世界上只有两种人，一种喜欢‘欺负’人，另一种则喜欢被欺负。当然，我是喜欢被欺负的那种。。。好惨啊。好吃亏啊。。。

okok...my sis wanna use now...i've been depriving her of it for quite long...hahahahah

i finished chem notes!!!! and econs notes!!!! hahahahahahaha...just can't remember them all too well. =( tomorrow will be math day. my vectors is disasterous...(just bcoz i can do tut questions doesn't mean my math is good....or any other subject for that matter...)

eye-drops were my 'saviour'. it doesn't hurt as badly as yesterday (that's why i don't mind using the com now) and the swelling seems to have gone done. God answers prayers! XP hahahahahhahaha. love that antiseptic eyedrop thingy.

but my neighbours were downright annoying today. there's major renovation going on next door and the noise is TERRIBLE!!! can still tahan the knocking and banging, but the DRILLINGS are going to DRIVE ME NUTS! it's LOUD, SHRILL and it makes EVERYTHING VIBRATE. EVERYTHING! it's testing my patience.

was watching that irritating korean show on channel U during dinner. it's the ONLY show that i only like 1 person in the whole show. that's quite sad....by jane standards. normally, i like the 2 main characters and 1-2 supporting characters. for this show, i only like 1 supporting character. 1. how pathetic. and he doesnt' come out very often, like at most 15 min per episode? hahahahaha....i only watch that show coz my mum wants to watch it. anyways....that guy is sooooooooooo nice to the girl (which i semi-like. she's getting more irritating as the show progresses) but she doesn't appreciate it. =( in spite of that, he still continues to be soooooooooo nice to her. that's why i like the guy...hahahahhahaha. i think if that girl continues to dao him, she will regret it man, he'll eventually stop being soooooo nice if there's no incentive...

无条件地付出？我无法做到。。。

i'm really suppose to be at ntu now but...hahahaahah. nvm, i'm going there later. spastic labs are counted...haiz. well i did learn hows to use the centrifuge, vortex and i revised my pipetteing skills.

i'm screwed up man. stupid pracs. screws my study plans.i'm screwed for blocks...hope can finish studying.

if u're asking me why i'm blogging then, it's coz i'm printing h3 notes....haiz. hahahahah

anyway....don't think i'll go online so often now. looking at the com screen hurts my eyes alot, especially since my left one is slightly swollen. PAIN PAIN PAIN. it's swollen, itchy and painful. i just wanna close my eyes and sleep all the time....no mood to study. but i'm half done with econs....erm...yay? hahahha...die lah. i think have cyst there. either way, it gets me off the com (though it gets me off the books too...hahahahah)

ok...time to head back to last min studying b4 going 4 h3.

1 WEEK TO BLOCKS!!!!!!!!! ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. *HYPERVENTILATES* I HAVEN'T STARTED HARD-CORE MUGGING YET!!!! ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH NO TIME NO TIME NO TIME!!!!!!!!

see..i'm not a mugger. a mugger would have been done with 1st round of mugging by now and i haven't even started. MUST PIA!

very sians....must go to ntu tomorrow for h3. WHOLE DAY LEH! nvm...i will wake up early tomorrow to mug a bit before going and i'll bring things there to mug. hmmm....i'm just wondering what to eat for lunch there. maybe i'll eat the korean food again though i just ate that yesterday. my nice nice $3.50 chicken bimbimbab. =) yummy! XP

AND GERIELLE IS A VERY VERY LUCKY GIRL! that girl ah....braved the rain and crowds to go and see her beloved wuzun and hu yu wei and the other 2 guys from gong zhu xiao mei. lucky her. at least she remembered to take pics of them after she managed to squeeze to near the front =) i'm not so free and crazy to go lah.....i'll either get trampled on or blocked due to my pathetic stature. no point.

anyway...had other stuff to do today. XP hahahahahahaha

replying addy's tags make me feel totally nostalgic. like how innocent (and bored) i was in primary school and lower sec. my fav after-school past-time (in sec 1. sec 1 leh....hahahah) was to go disturbing ants in their nest or around it. hahahahahaha....sounds quite no life but it's actually quite fun to terrorise them. oh man.....i sound so.....nvm. we either poke sticks into their nests and drag them out (that's when we found that some ants have hairy butts...) or we fill the holes those sandpit ants dug out to make their nests. either way, i think they hated us BIG TIME.

oooooo...i remember 'transplanting' those weeds in the field too =) those irritating red weeds with stuff that stick to your socks. anyways....we plucked them from all around the field and stuck them together in the middle of the field so there's this big red patch that can be seen from afar.

i remember having a 'freeze and melt' crazy p6 class, so we'll play freeze and melt everyday during recess time, making crazy long chains to unfreeze people stuck in the middle and stuff.

i remember nat chasing addy around the class coz addy stole her bottle or pencil case (can't remember which) and nat shouting 'death threats' as she runs. sixuan and i would spectate in the corner and laugh....hahahah. i remember making stapler bows with sixuan and using it to shoot ball-point pen refills at the 'eye exercises' poster (i think it was that poster...)

i remember 'freeloading' off nat in p4 with nut at the pink steps (which are gone now btw....=( they built something on it. the canteen piano is gone too to make way for a revamped co-op =( my dear childhood memories....destroyed) i remember having recess with april everyday in p2 at the pink steps too....

i remember skipping recess to play in the com lab everyday, otherwise i'll da bao french fries to eat as i play. i remember everyone else doing the same thing too...hahaha...so must rush to chope computers xP i remember my whole p5 chinese class tricking the teacher to bring us to 'min lab' (it's actually the main computer lab...her eng pronounciation isn't good) almost every other chinese lesson so we can play com games. i remember neopets was the in-thing then. even i had a neopets account man....(i abandoned mine after i just couldn't earn lotsa money. i keep being able to qualify for soup kitchen and get free soup everyday....that means i was dirt poor....)

i remember that evil playground. i was half happy and half sad when they dismentled it when i was p6/sec1. happy coz i fell down twice at 2 dif spots in p1, needed to be stitched up after 1 of the falls somemore (who ask me, the non-sporty, clumsy gal, to hang out with this uber sporty girl and neh-neh wanna do what she does? haiz....) sad coz it was part of my childhood anyway and i miss playing the scissors-paper-stone game on the balancing beam...

i remember that terrible chinese week singing song thing. didn't really listen to much chinese songs at that time so obviously malu-ed myself. hahahhaha...but it was fun practising with gerielle and ahdian. i also remembered that it was after that time that i started listening to chinese songs....must be coz of the bad experience.

i remember the melody song and how sarah tai (incidentally the smartest gal in class) created it with katie and teri. i also remember how addy, for some strange, unexplanable reason, forever remembers me as being sarah tai's best friend even though i wasn't and i only sat next to sarah for 1 year. (addy knows i hold a grudge against her for this...xP)

i remember eating only honeydew for recess for the longest time in sec school. and i loved my honeydew man! i remember eating it with hang! my fellow honeydew lover who attempted (and failed miserably) to hook me up with a vietnamese flower. (coz hang is vietnamese...) and i still remember her hilarious 2nd helping story...hahahahahaha

i remember doing crazy things and talking on and on and on with addy, gerielle and ahdian. i remember gerielle and i talking super random things (mainly about whoever we're crazy about actually..) while doing math papers from other schools. i remember addy doing the same thing with cynthia behind...laughing on and on....dunno what talking them. i remember gerielle doodling on my books (and how can i forget them when i look at the doodles? hahahah. actually is more like defacing my books with her love for jj lin xP)

ahhhhhh...the things i remember. uber random, but part of my very interesting mg life. and i haven't gone into handbells yet. BEST BEST BEST CCA IN THE WORLD! COOLIO DUDES! and i haven't gone onto more random aspects of my sec sch life yet....but this is getting long and its really late now.

if only i can get that stupid pdf file to work....i need to print my notes leh....gonna restart my com

ya...the idea of econs day is spastic. it just means that i'm gonna mug all things econs today. but there's a limit to how much econs one person can take at a time....so i'm taking a brain break again. hahahahahha.

原来我不帅 is seriously tempting me to watch ep 8 of it. NO. BAD JANE. MUST MUG ECONS. yay! i'm glad gerielle likes it too! =) but then again, it has jj lin inside, so she'll prob like it coz of him. hahahahha. lucky ac peeps. their common tests/blocks/whatever tests u call it are over. AND MINE ISN'T =( =(

getting back pw tomorrow. dun feel anything. not happy, sad, excited, worried. just 麻木. only happy that there's no gp. hahahahahahah.

i still don't feel like returning to econs. my table is crowded with those notes and that daunting mess is just putting me off. haiz...nevermind. i'll type more random stuff.

ohhhhh...i'm doubling eunice for schniker (it's a german name. haven't the foggiest idea about how to spell it....) it's seriously avant garde and i'm sort of gonna play a solo part. it's sort of coz it's for a chamber group pitted against 2 violin soloists and there's only 2 cellos playing different parts in the chamber group. it sounds quite weird though....i don't really think the audience (esp hc audience) can accept it.....lotsa dissonances, funny melodies and stuff.

okkkkkk....better return to my horrible econs. maybe i'll file some of my notes to make the pile seem more appealing (like that will really work......haha)

ok...i think i can finish my work today. just giving my brain a break by doing retarded, mindless stuff. hahahahahahah. hate tchaik. practised quite a fair bit of that today. hahahahah. section leader will be so happy with me. hahahahahahah.

i think i'm falling sick. my parents and sister say that my voice has sort of changed and i feel like there's some fur-ball or something shoved down my throat. very very itchy/irritated there and stuff. nevermind. lozenges to the rescue!

studying is bad. it makes me go high and siao. and random too. actually i'm just posting for the sake of posting. hahahahahahha.

anyways....today was an ok day. didn't get called on by bio tutor, but she did remember the sitting alternate thing again. haiz....nevermind. the cold, hard truth is that she has wonderful memory. hahahahaha. at least i sat next to nice people again =)

sians....strings tomorrow. i'm gonna check if people uploaded my show. it's got jj inside and it's quite stress-relieving and retardedly funny. 原来我不帅!!!! and i LOVE the ending song!!!! 期待爱!!!! and i think 嫚嫚 is cool! (yes...my fav fav female character there!)

可能是因为觉得自己蛮像嫚嫚（虽然我没她那么酷，不会什么武功，华文程度也差得远。。。），所以喜欢她这个角色。我也喜欢带着一幅面具过人生，打死都不会把真心话说出来。有时的确是蛮痛苦的，但我也无所谓。。。

好久没写/打华文字了，好像退步了许多。。。哈哈。（如果真的本来有退步的空间。。。我的华文烂到爆。。。）

it's sort of similar to this english compo i did in sec sch, except that the topic was about the year in retrospect. hahahahah. similar lah! i'll finish it in 10 min then sleep. have spa tmr....sians.

mon: mugged and played cello (combined prac for strings...) don't really remember what i did other than eat mango flavoured gelato...(very nice mah....)

tues: i think there was lotsa tuts, stayed back to mug for a short while too to prevent myself from going home to sleep. bio tutor came up with the 'BRILLIANT' idea of sitting boy-girl alternate for tutorial. haiz....like kindergarten or pri school....

weds: there was this nice play for ct session i think...very funny. hahahahah. then had strings where audrey and i shared a nice nice block of rittersport chocolate, cornflake flavour.

thurs: i only remember mugging with cheryl after school while waiting for her parents to come. hahahahah. oh....and the bio tutor remembered her brilliant idea...haiz. at least i was sitting next to someone nice. (as in i don't mind sitting next to lah....)

fri: the longest, sianest day. pe was ok....played basketball the whole time. laxing, pass-the-ball-more-often-than-bouncing-it kind of game. hahahahah. but still very fun. then played with the guys after our water break. quite funny, 4 guys vs 10 girls (jianan's 'wonderful' idea...he really doesn't think too highly of our ball-playing skills) we can still barely pwn them coz we have yl and cheryl. then 4 other guys came and played, so we played 6 guys vs 10 girls+2 guys (and we got the better 2 guys....hahahahahhaha) girls play laxing bball while guys take it sooooo seriously. oh and girls wouldn't block guys coz they're kinda gross to touch accidentally while snatching the ball during pe....hahahahahah.

erm....then went for a walk walk with cheryl, caro and monkey to international school side (out of boredom during 1-hr long break) walked all the way there until the gate of boarding school then walked back. hahahahahahah...sad life man. monkey and cheryl 'bullied' some small high sch boys into letting them play a 2min game of table-tennis. what else....had h3 in the afternoon? ok....boring life.

sat: mugged a bit then went to ntu for com lab session for h3. ok....i don't want to research proteins when i grow up. very sian diao stuff....must keep staring at the atoms, work out how they bond to each other and find out which aa is it.

YF MESSAGE WAS REALLY GOOD! ok....must arrest this scary development. must change my priorities and desires. actually i know about the problem for some time, just don't know how to solve it. BUT NOW I KNOW! =)

sun: did something stupid today. must sleep earlier on sats next time. hahahaha. today's message not bad too! XP

ok....time for me to sleep liao. i'll attempt waking up early tmr to do econs before sch starts....

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